Archives for February 2013

Searching Souls

The conflict between who we are and who we want to be is at the core of the human struggle. Duality, in fact, lies at the very center of the human experience. Life and death, good and evil, hope and resignation coexist in every person and exert their force in every facet of our lives. Debbie Ford – The Shadow Effect

For the second time, I’m reading Change Anything: The New Science of Personal Success by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, David Maxfield and Ron McMillan. The authors make a very strong case that successful change on the personal (or soul) level like quitting smoking, losing weight, improving a relationship and getting your spending or drinking under control is more than a matter of will power. Successful changers learn new skills and adopt new philosophies that will take them where they want to go.

When it comes to “changers”, I have to remind myself that not all of us are searching souls. For example a quick google search offers this tidbit to substantiate my claim. 33 percent of high school graduates never read another book for the rest of their lives. 42 percent of college graduates never read another book after college. 80 percent of U.S. families did not buy or read a book last year. 70 percent of U.S. adults have not been in a bookstore in the last five years. 57 percent of new books are not read to completion.

One speaker/author I am familiar with estimates that only 15% of the population fall into the changer/seeker category. I can also allow that in life’s journey that individuals may go through seasons of seeking and contentment.

Since my passion is health coaching it’s probably obvious why this subject would be top of mind. My clients come to me seeking to improve their health beginning with reaching a healthy weight. Its common knowledge that two thirds of Americans are over weight and half those are medically obese. For virtually 99 percent of the people I consult with, this is not their first attempt to get their weight under control. The stories I hear are a combination of successes and setback – with setback being the most recent experience before talking with me. As an independent professional health coach with Take Shape for Life, my goal with each client can be summed up in two words, “for Life”. But achieving this goal takes much more than will power. It takes skills, tools, philosophy and community.

A casual glace at my newsfeed on Facebook, candid conversations at Starbucks or a look around the community church uncovers a certain number of searching souls. Searching for God, searching for validation or answers or maybe searching for a solution for their health and weight issues. Since Kerry Patterson already patented “The Science of Personal Success”, I’d like to lay claim to the phrase “Celebrating Personal Achievement”. If you are searching or maybe know someone who is searching to create and celebrate personal achievement, get in touch with me on the form below.

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Soul Searching

Where there is no love, there is fear. And fear, once it has gripped the mind, is like a vice that threatens to crush the soul.
– Marianne Williamson The Shadow Effect

For me, January brought an intense period of soul searching. And sometimes I (and maybe you) think I’m (we’re) in this search for a deeper understanding of life alone. But as I looked around, it became obvious that there are others seeking too. Some successful and published seekers estimate the number to be one or two out of ten. And if you are one of those one or two, thankful yet restless, then I would like to connect with you.

There’s a lot of good to be found in contentment, but complacency is a dangerous counterfeit. Dictionary dot com defines complacency as “a feeling of quiet pleasure or security, often while unaware of some potential danger, defect, or the like…” Life is never static. Life is always dynamic. So while it’s ok to be thankful and content in the present, it’s never wise to let down our guard or be complacent.

Some things in life can’t be ignored. For example the tire is going flat and your job is half way across town. But other things aren’t so pressing today, but will come back to do us harm if ignore. Planning for retirement is one example. Being proactive regarding our diet and health is another.

As a coach, I work in a profession where I help those who have neglected their diet and health – usually for a long time. My job is different because unlike the cup of coffee I purchased 30 minutes ago completing a successful transaction, my transactions aren’t successful until a transformation takes place with my client requiring a commitment on both sides and establishing a relationship.

I have become an expert and continue to grow in the science of personal change and achievement aka coaching.

In order to illustrate my point it was my good fortune that the February 11 issue of People Magazine features country artist Tim McGraw with the bold caption on the cover “I had to change my life”. Why he quit drinking and got super fit.

 ‘I want to be around for my kids.’

It takes some soul searching to discover your “why”. But once you find it, that’s the first step and the catalyst to lasting change. A solid why overrides the short sighted choices that lead to immediate gratification at the expense of a long term benefit. For example, a donut with my coffee would really taste good right now (all that fat, sugar and some salt), but it certainly wouldn’t move me toward my long term goal of healthy longevity.

Me personally, I want to be around for my kids too and furthermore, I feel like I have much further to go before I finish my purpose in this life. It will require health and vitality.

I’ll share a tool that I learned from Dr. Wayne Scott Andersen. When faced with a choice that you find tempting, pause for a moment, do some soul searching and ask yourself this question. “What do I want now and what do I want most?”

Tim McGraw wasn’t complacent with his fame and fortune. Looking (searching his soul) into a default future he realized that his lifestyle could cause him to lose his health and affect his ability to be there for his family. So he lost the extra 40 pounds and quit drinking because what he wants most is to be around (for a long time) for his kids.

What do you want most?

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Serious and committed candidates can enroll for a free coaching session and added materials.
  • Your confidential comments for the coach. (To comment on the article publically, leave your remarks in the "Speak Your Mind" box below.)